Coaching with Yoda

My son bought this keyring for me. (His nickname for me is Yoda because, in his words, I am “small and wise”) and it got me thinking about coaching, and about Yoda and what makes him such a wise master. In The Empire Strikes Back, Yoda knows that if Luke Skywalker has any doubts about his ability to succeed then he will not be able to use the full capability of ‘the force’ to lift a spaceship. He knows that Luke must be absolutely certain. When Luke says “All right, I’ll give it a try”. Yoda encourages Luke to fully commit to his success by wisely saying "Do or not do. There is no try".

‘Try’ seems like such an insignificant little word. On the face of it, it is encouraging and supportive. But when we pay attention to the word we can see it for what it really is.

This permission to fail is ingrained in us from early childhood. It has negative links to being encouraged to attempt something we don’t like, are afraid of or really don’t want to do.  “Just try your Broccoli”, “As long as you try your best”. “Just try…” means it’s okay to fail, okay if you don’t manage it. At least you tried. It is a consolation prize.  It is a get out clause, an escape hatch. An excuse. Try to pick up a pencil from the desk and you will find it impossible. You either pick up the pencil or you don’t. Do or not do. There is no try.

As a Master, Yoda knew that having this mind set is crucial to success. It provides focus, confidence and commitment, all of which are needed to get the results you want. Specific, clear focus on what you want with specific clear actions that confidently take you towards your goal. Commitment to success. Doing – not trying. Make no ‘plan B’ and decide that failure is not an option.

When I work with people on deciding what action they are going to take, around 80% of them use the phrase “I am going to try to…….”. Once we change this to “I am going to…..” and remove the get out clause they have given themselves, they actually feel different. More positive, energised, confident and motivated!

Master coaches like Yoda know how to help you to achieve your results by getting you really clear on what you want and to identify the specific actions you are going to take to get you there. They help you to use clarity and to find the certainty and motivation to commit and to do – no coach worthy of the name will help you to try. The word ‘try’ sets limits. It robs you of your focus and energy. Trying is for losers. Doing is for achievers!

So, know what you want to achieve and DO something that will take you towards that. If what you are doing doesn’t bring you the results you want, take action and DO something else. If that doesn’t work, take action and DO something else. Keep DOING until you get the result you want. Or give up (that’s what most people do by the way).